Letting go is one of the hardest things you’ll ever do. We’ve all started relationships hoping that they’ll last. We all live our lives like we have decades of life left in us. But life can be unpredictable. Things change, grow, fall apart, move, and transform all the time. Some things shatter your world and you’re left trying to find a new way to build those broken pieces back up. Letting go is one of the most important things you’ll need to do in life. After all, in this world, nothing lasts forever. You need to accept things that are out of your control. But we can control how we react to the suffering we’ve been dealt. In this article, we’re going to share 21 ways to let go of mistakes, pain, and suffering.
How to Start Letting Go of Mistakes, Pain and Suffering
1. Give Yourself Time to Grieve
Before it’s time to start letting go, you need to give yourself time to grieve. We’ve all lost loved ones to dreadful diseases or accidents and no one judged you when you cried. They’ve felt that pain before too. And then of course, during the break-up of a long-term relationship, it’s normal to feel sad about the end there too. While new beginnings are beautiful, endings can sometimes be harder to accept. We don’t always want to say goodbye. And sometimes we’re really not ready to. So take the time you need to go through the stages of grief. Whether that’s crying, beating up a punching bag, talking it out with a friend or trained professional, it’s important to let it all out. And once you’re finally ready to move on, you can begin letting go.
2. Manage Negative Emotions
To give yourself a chance of letting go of past mistakes and suffering you’ll need to learn how to manage negative emotions. Your thoughts are a key indicator of how you’ll feel. If you’re thinking about bad things, you’ll likely feel bad too. We can’t always control what thoughts pop into our head, however, we can rewire our brains to be more positive. When a negative thought pops into your head, manually think the polar opposite thought. With enough practice, you’ll be doing it automatically. And you’ll experience fewer negative emotions as a result because you’ll stop ruminating thoughts in their tracks.
3. Make a Clean Cut
One of the easiest ways to let go of suffering is to make a clean cut of the person causing the suffering. If you’re going through a breakup, you might delete the contact off your social media, block their number on your phone, change your phone number, move to a new city, or start a new job. Change is good for the soul. Some may say you’re running away from your problems. And maybe that’s 10% true. But it’s also a way to end specific problems. You need to make changes to let go effectively. Sometimes letting go means saying goodbye and really meaning it.
4. Seek Guidance From a Spiritual Teacher
Having a mentor, therapist, or teacher guide you on your journey of letting go will help you make a separation from your situation and emotional pain. A spiritual practice of some sort, such as practicing meditation, mindfulness, or kindness will help elevate you on your journey because you’re putting out goodness into the world. Having a teacher guide you through this journey will allow you to actually face painful feelings so you can heal from them, instead of shoving them down or running away from it.
5. Make a Positive Change
When making a mindful attempt to let go, focus on making positive changes in your life. Embark on that new, exciting chapter. This is your time to evolve. Become a better person than you were yesterday. Maybe you invest on reading communication books to help you communicate your needs better. Or maybe you recognize that you’ve been so obsessed with loving others that you forgot to love yourself so you start practicing more self care. When letting go of the pain, focus on letting in some good in your life. You deserve all the happiness in the world and you can take action to make sure you get your fair share of it.
6. Alleviate Human Pain
Modern life is filled with detached social messaging and a lack of human connection. In your everyday life, you need to deal with negative feelings and connect with others. Human suffering can be eliminated by letting go of the past. However, we often cling onto our past as if it’s tied to our identity. As if it’s a sort of punishment for all past wrong-doings. It can be life changing to realize all you can control is the present. And share in the human experience with all of your life energy with others. The healing process depends on you letting go of your past, so don’t dig deeper into worlds you can no longer control. Moving forward is now your only option.
7. Don’t Take Things Personally
The most important thing to remember when letting go is don’t take things personally. If a relationship falls apart, it feels personal because it happens to you. But there’s just so many freaking factors at play. Compatibility, family, wants, needs, goals, values, and of course the other person. Sometimes relationships end, leaving you feeling sad. But the end of a relationship isn’t always about you. Sometimes it’s about the other person. And if someone hurts you, it’s usually because they’re hurt themselves.
When we take things personally that’s when the grudges form, the toxic behaviors come out, and the worst feelings transpire. But when we accept that there are many variables that lead people to an event, we often find there’s many factors that led them to it. Maybe they learned bad behaviors in childhood that were never corrected which led them to hurt you. Or maybe they just had a bad day and you showed up at the wrong time and they took it out on you. The best thing you can do is be more empathetic to people’s needs and recognize that it’s not always about you. Love and let go.
8. Practice Meditation
If you really don’t know how to master the art of letting go, you might want to try meditation. Of course, we’d love it if you used Declutter The Mind’s guided meditation if you’ve been thinking about it. But overall, meditation can help give you a moment of clarity. You can help rewire your brain but taking the time to notice thoughts without dwelling on them. It constantly reminds you to focus your attention back on your breath so your ruminating thoughts never go on those tangents you hate so much.
Following a guided meditation is great for beginners who are looking to meditate but are weary of being alone with their thoughts without supervision. I know, the mind is a terrifying place. So with the help of our meditation guide, you can work on creating new pathways in your brain so that you finally let go of those negative thought cycles your brain does for you all the damn time. You’ll finally have a chance at letting go the pain, suffering, and hurt.
Try this meditation for letting go on YouTube. If you don’t want to use a guide, you can use a meditation timer instead.
9. Focus on Your Human Development
If you’re stuck in your suffering, you can’t develop as a person. We are at our worst when we’re filled with negative emotions bottled up within ourselves. The painful feelings need to be released. Therapy can help you channel your past mistakes into something that uplifts you and the world around you. As a person, you deserve happiness and peace of mind. There’s no point in holding yourself back for years because of human error. Rebuilding yourself up isn’t an easy task, but it’s a worthwhile one. You’ve got so much love in yourself, pour it out into the world, and discover what you’re capable of achieving.
10. Invest In Your Physical Health
Letting go of negative energy can be done through physical activity. Fight or flight tends to kick in when we’re feeling anxious. So, if you’ve been struggling with mental health, going for a walk or run can be exactly what your body wants you to do. So don’t sit still. Move. Take that deep breath of fresh air when out in nature. Let that strong emotion within you get released through aggressive body movements. Become a physically stronger version of yourself so you can take on major threats, that haunt you, in the future. Get out of your comfort zone and into a higher consciousness by being one with your body. The mind and body are interconnected. So if you feel negative emotions, release them physically. Cry them out. Shake them out. Do what you’ve got to do to finally start letting go of all your pain.
